As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five-year phased plan for what will be known as EuroEnglish (Euro for short).
In the first year, 's' will be used instead of the soft 'c'. Sertainly, sivil servants will reseive this news with joy. Also, the hard 'c' will be replased with 'k'. Not only will this klear up konfusion, but typewriters and word prosessors kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome 'ph' will be replased by 'f'. This will make words like 'fotograf' 20 per sent shorter.
In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reakh the stage where more komplikated khanges are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of silent 'e's in the language is disgrasful, and they would go.
By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 'th' by 'z' and 'w' by 'v'.
During ze fifz year, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords kontaing 'ou', and similar changes vud of kurs be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters. After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a realy sensibl vriten styl. Zer wil be no mor trubls or difikultis and al vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer.
Ze drem vil finali kom tru.